That shitting, benighted, underhand and unethical Bamboo is BACK. At the moment, it is just a few thick stalks: horticultural erections straining through the earth – but we all know what the bamboo’s game plan is, don’t we? WORLD DOMINATION. Not content with having sucked all the nutrients out of the soil, rendering it about [...]
Archive for May, 2008
It’s Back
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Bamboo on May 11, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
WordPress – A Love Letter
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Blog, Gabbler, Wordpress on May 10, 2008 | 1 Comment »
May all who associate with the dark god iWeb suffer in torment and misery. All hail the mighty WordPress! My old blog was a thing of iWeb based beauty and frailty: a Mayfly among blogs, compromised somewhat by Apple’s inability to fix the fact that every time I tried to publish, iWeb decided to quit [...]
Fearless Leader
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Advertising, Client, Creative Directors on May 9, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I haven’t written of Fearless Leader recently. I have been working intensively with Travesty of All Things Gay, and so she has been somewhat in the background (which is not her natural habitat). I’m beginning to feel a bit sorry for her. Everything that needs sorting out (from Woody Allen in Robert de Niro’s Body [...]
Oh. Hello.
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Advertising, Client, Creative Directors on May 9, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
We’d been in a Client meeting, which went well, and were waiting to catch the shuttle back to the train station. Amongst the congratulatory chat of the post-meeting session, and the overly English lining up to board the shuttle, was cast the apple of Discord, with the appearance of Mercurial Creative Director We Fired. Clearly [...]
Sentimental Journey
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Interviews, Planners on May 8, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
My desk is awash with the CVs of would-be Planners and would-be-far-better-paid Planners. I find it quite easy to be brutal about the senior people who are looking to manage their careers, and make the next “smart move” – and so they’ve had a fifty per cent success rate with me. The great ones are [...]
The Monk in His Cell
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Children, Punishment on May 6, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Youngest Son kicked my father over the weekend. But, as Wife has pointed out, the trouble with any punishment that we have been doling out, is that he simply doesn’t GIVE a shit. So, Wife has taken draconian measures, and stripped his entire room of EVERYTHING – and that means everything: there are no soft [...]
Double Wank With Shit Chips
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Advertising, Client, Planning, Workshop on May 6, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
There are, in advertising circles, too many people making a living by holding up a tube of toothpaste and forcing people to consider what it might be were it not, in fact, a tube of toothpaste. What kind of animal would it be? What kind of party would it host? Where would it do its [...]
Tired Is Not The Word
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Gabbler, iWeb, Wordpress on May 5, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Enlivened only by a bit of sporadic sparring with Good Friend in PR, I have spent the last six hours manually transferring my old blog (“Gabbler”) from its iWeb home to the new, shinier, but shittier named surroundings of WordPress, where I shall publish as Eiljert – and a shiny apple to the thousands of [...]
How Do You Follow An Owl?
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Birthday Presents, Owl, Wife on May 5, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Sunday, 24th March 2007 It’s my own fault for having been so brilliantly imaginative in the first place. For our Wedding Anniversary (7 years), I bought Wife a Victorian sculpture of an owl for the garden of our new house. Nothing as magnificent as the huge thing in the picture above: it’s perhaps two feet [...]
A Bone Collector Moment
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged "The Bone Collector", "The History Boys", Alan Bennett, Taxis on May 5, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Why is it that I am convinced that every cab driver, in any foreign country, is intent not on delivering me to my hotel; but is, instead, determined to drive me to a patch of wasteland, fillet me and turn me into the basis of an elaborate shrubbery? There’s a passage in Alan Bennett’s brilliant [...]
