In the last ten days, the Internet has given me the following presents:-
- A T-Shirt (for Best Friend) emblazoned with the slogan “I LOVE MY VAGINA” (originally from Lesbian Pride – so there it is as a bold declamation, untempered by anything such as ironic, Clerkenwell-lite typography.
- A copy of “Shakespeare’s Ambiguity” – a masterly piece of scholarship which was for a while the only item which I have ever seriously contemplated nicking from a library (I photocopied every page instead); and which has been out of print and unobtainable for nearly two decades.
- A cartoon of Fiona Shaw as Hedda Gabler, originally accompanying a review in The New Yorker, and a beautiful piece of linesmanhip as well as a record of that towering event.
- Aftershave made of myrrh – so I have now achieved my ambition of smelling like a church.
- Large prints of two of my children (the other having rendered himself so clownishly stupid-looking in the photographs, I decided not to immortalise him thus).
- A Slanket for Wife (this is a blanket with sleeves: entirely synthetic, extraordinarily warm – and ludicrously ugly).
