Apparently, other than “money”, “Christmas” is the most dangerous discussion that a couple hoping to stay together can embark upon. If they choose to have this conversation whilst in the car park of IKEA, they are well and truly fucked, to the extent that initiating the conversation may be considered inflammatory and grounds for granting [...]
Posts Tagged ‘Christmas’
Christmas
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Christmas, Sister, Wife on December 2, 2009 | 2 Comments »
Farewells – One Fond, One Not So Fond
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Account Manager About Whom I Have Changed My Mind, Best Friend, Christmas, Family, New York, Parents, Sister, Travesty of All Things Gay, Wife on December 21, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I am loathe to use the term “Annus Horribilis” – primarily because I always try to avoid using terms popularised by in-bred, German midget bigots, but also because it has become such a cliche – but, I will be so glad to see the end of this year. With the exception of Sister’s and Best [...]
The Workplace Christmas Skulker
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Christmas, Christmas Presents, Fearless Leader, Old Friend at Work on December 19, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I am the Workplace Christmas Skulker. In simple terms, this means that when “required” to give a Christmas present to someone at work, I fudge the issue completely. There are a couple of approaches to the presentation of gifts in the workplace, all of which I have encountered recently, none of which I can “pull [...]
Britney Spears for the Middle Classes.
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Best Friend, Christmas, Wife on December 7, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
A branch of Waitrose has opened on Chiswick High Road – and the ensuing excitement of the well-heeled residents of this marvellous place is exhilarating to behold. Thrill as they stare excitedly at the cheese counter! Smile indulgently as they devour the contents of the patisserie with their eyes! Gurgle as they wonder at [...]
Feeding the Cake
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Christmas, Wife on May 5, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Friday, 23rd November 2007 I can’t bake. I am an OK cook otherwise, but baking absolutely defeats me. This is not a problem (not simply because it has been possible for some weeks now to BUY cakes), but because Wife is a first class baker. There is one honourable exception to my “me no bakey” [...]
It’s Beginning To Cook A Lot Like Christmas
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Christmas on May 5, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Sunday, 25th November 2007 Mixed peel is harder than you’d think to get hold of. Likewise suet. Undyed cherries, is similarly a fucker. However, I did manage to get these, as well as another samovar full of Cognac, and so the mincemeat is now made. It probably cost about £14 a jar, but hey – [...]
The True Spirit of Christmas
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Christmas, Family, Wife on May 5, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Saturday, 1st December 2007 With eyes filled with wonder, their brushed hair glinting like spun gold The Children gathered round to witness the opening of the first window on the Advent Calendar, and to hear again the Greatest Story Ever Told… Actually, that’s not what happened. Wife asked with her studied, puzzled voice “Where did [...]
Fear of Stockings
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Christmas, Stockings, Wife on May 5, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Wednesday, 12th December 2007 Like most red-cliched males, I think there are few things finer in all of God’s creation than the sight of a woman in stockings and suspenders. Pathetic, really. But at this time of year, they take on a horrible significance for me – and fill me with dread. This is because [...]
